The imperatives of nonverbal communication : attitude, body language and congruency!

mai 13, 2013


As I’ve said at the end of my webinar, “Practice for success – Verbal and Nonverbal congruency”, here is a brief of those 7 clear ways of communication and influence:

1. Be aware of your own body!

Upon the communication situation and the emotions you are feeling, your body change posture, position, makes moves which you better be aware of.

Ask questions about you: How do I sit? Do I have straight back? How do I behave when I am anxious? How do I walk? How is my look? How is my posture?

  • 2. Train yourself to be natural!

You can train such an actor which prepares his role. Practice. You have nothing to lose. Get out of the shell : open your arms,  keep you back straight and walk and greet the others.

Use open gestures,  hospitable facial expressions,  direct look, gentle and profound eyes.

3. Talk in public and videotape yourself!

In this way you will be aware of the rule of the 3 V’s : visual (body and  face expressions), verbal (what it is said) and vocal (voce rhythm). Use the coherency of the 3 V when you communicate. Neither of the aspects (vocal, verbal or visual) cannot be neglected.

4. Be a friend with your voice!

If you omit words, syllables or you stutter, is necessary to improve your diction. Using your voice proper becomes an advantage in the relations with others! Here  are some simple ways:

  • Practice by trying to talk keeping a pencil between your teeth;
  • Read  a text from a book  with loud voice an be careful at  pronunciation.

5. Listen actively!

Listening is important, if not more important than the speech itself! We need to listen what it is  said – not what we believe it is said or what we think the other thinks. Her empathy is important : be aware of the content it’s being said (information, facts, numbers), then to the emotions which are expressed. Always  observe the synchronization  with the nonverbal part.

6. Avoid exagerations!

In communication matter, excess is very bad seen. In a study made at Princeton University, the students of both genres were asked what methods they use when they  use when they try to impress somebody. Exaggeration was first mentioned. Don’t smile too much, don’t  try to impress, don’t be  extremely polite and avoid to speak to others from up!

7. 100% Message received!

Scientific studies show that : from  the total of 100% of a message, we receive only 80%, the speaker hear only 60%, understands just 40% and is not  capable to reproduce just 20%. What is to be done? As more we bring more information, as more we are original, natural, as easily the message is transmitted. The  quality of the message gives its power!

Attitude is the first aspect which people take in  direct  communication. I am convinced that the secret of  communicating  attitude is body language and congruency.

Do you really want to find out what your body can communicate?

Write me an email at if you want to receive my nonverbal challenge!

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